how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
