the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
The power of my boobs compel you
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