why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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