It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize
