I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
