There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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