the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
why do cheetos always look like penises
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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