I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
