check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
