In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize