i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
A+ Viking dick
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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