Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
