the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
