Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
