How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
