Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
