Cold hands, warm shart.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Randomize
