He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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