have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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