capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
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