i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
