garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
