No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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