it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize