Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
He shit in the fireplace
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
