why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
