Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
He felt like a one man threesome
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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