I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Randomize
