Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
It's Friday. Sex?
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize