her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize