It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
