Whatcha textin bout Willis?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
