And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
