how do flat chested girls get laid?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
