ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
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