OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I wish life had little blips of pornography
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Can vaginas get frostbite?
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
