She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize