if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
