You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
