THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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