we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
