lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
