she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
