HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
