smell my finger.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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