her vagine was all disorganized.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize
