your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
