Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
