So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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