I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
The feeling are messing with the penis
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
