So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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