Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Drunk is a universal language darling
Randomize
